Friday, September 02, 2016

Dawkins, Maher Blast Churches For Selfless, Life-Saving Aid During Louisiana Floods

Another fine article from the Babylon Bee:

HOLLYWOOD, CA—Television host Bill Maher gathered with famous atheist Richard Dawkins for a web-exclusive episode of Real Time with Bill Maher Friday to discuss the recent, devastating floods in Louisiana, spending much of their time together detailing the immense destruction and blasting the selfless, life-saving relief carried out by the myriad Christian churches in the area.

“These churches, their assistance was absolutely crucial in saving lives—probably lots of lives—which just goes to show you the incredible selfishness of these people, and the depth of their delusions,” an indignant Maher stated.  “Like, wow, really?  Gathering boats and volunteers and evacuating scores of people from their submerged cars and houses?  Opening your churches and homes to victims you don’t even know in the midst of catastrophic flooding in which thousands and thousands of people lost everything they owned?  Why, because your magic tyrant in the clouds told you to?  Pathetic.”

“I’ve been saying for decades that religion ruins everything, and this is a prime example of that,” Dawkins noted.  “I’d bet that more than a few of these Christians are utterly traditional in their beliefs, and there they are, literally giving the clothes off their backs to people in need, instead of just allowing government relief efforts to be totally insufficient.”

“And don’t forget that these churches are tax exempt,” Maher added.  “Tax exempt!  So what do they do?  They use their church campuses as launching areas for disaster relief.  [Expletive] Christians!”

“One day—one day we’ll find a cure for religion,” said Dawkins. “Until then, we can only keep doing what we’re doing, and hope more people see that religion poisons everything it touches.”

1 comment:

The Thoughtful Pilgrim said...

I thought for a moment this article was serious. And that is sad. Because the irrationality and absurdity of the perspective is fiendishly hard to distinguish from genuine secularism and atheism. In Massachusetts, the largest provider of adoption services - the Catholic Church - was forced to close down because they would not yield to new same-sex definitions and regulations. You cannot get more ridiculous than that, and yet it is entirely consonant with the satire of the article!